I was led this not so merry dance for several years, then they wondered why i stopped trying altogether and coudnt give a fuck about it. Well, duh... i wonder why that might have been?
I had the "chat" with an elder plenty of times and it was always just out of reach and try again in 6 months (CO visit).. talk about discouraging, especially when ungifted but married to elders daughter ass kissers got made up at top speed. I wasnt ever enough of a yes man I guess.
Background: I was an accidental MS at 23 (because i'd dobbed the double lifers in with the elders icn the POs golden boy son who i thought was my best friend and found i didnt really now him at all) and immediately regretted it and was nearly taken off a few times as i made little effort at the time, then about 27 I got my finger out and made lots of effort and actually believed it all and it showed, 29 i took the watchtower when the elders at the school and was about 6 months away from being an elder (i was told this) then i moved away to work and quite fancied a break so didnt get made an MS in the new cong, then about a year later i moved back to my old cong age 30 and wanted very much to take up where i left off and to be an MS asap and then quickly an elder, ..or so i thought. Absolutely no fricken way was it going to happen. The PO had it in for me (because all those years before his son got his wrist slapped because of me) despite a warm welcome back from him and blocked me at every turn, year in and year out. Then when he pissed off to Ireland the new PO took a similar view and basically if you werent related to him then you had many many extra hoops to jump thru. So off and on about 8 years of mind games and disappointment. I quit at 40.
i wasnt alone in this kind of game, it was mostly about power. obviously any change in the body or the MS pool had consequences for that power that the holy trinity (PO / SO / Sec) wielded. they guarded that power with extreme and petty jealousy.
Glad about it now though. maybe if they hadnt pissed me off so much my head wouldnt have been even open to testing my religion.